It's not like I'm alive, it's just waiting for the day to be over. Everyday. No motivation, almost no feelings, carelessness, procrastination, avoiding people and social situations. Did school make me this way? By having a bad school system that bores me and I want to get through it as fast as I can because I don't enjoy it, did that happen to my life? Am I not enjoying it anymore? I have some dreams and hopes for the future but I guess my hopes are so high, I'll never get to touch them. And people remind me of that every day, that I'm not good enough, or that I shouldn't have expectations because I will end up disappointed. But after all those hopes and expectations are usually what gets me through the day. Even though I feel sad about knowing that my dreams won't probably come true and if they will, it won't be easy at all. But life isn't supposed to be easy, It's supposed to be exciting and mostly fun.
Maybe it will get better one day. Now I just have to get through the day.
